Recently, I’ve started studying again.
By choice? I guess you could call it that.
I’ve always been a Philomath since I discovered the world. Luckily, I learned later in life (but not too late) that knowledge is everything.
When I graduated high school almost a decade ago (yikes), I spent my empty days with a schedule of short studies in multiple categories: philosophy, esotericism, brain exercises, literature, and language.
Since then, I’ve only spent my free time in activities and studies of my interest during that time. If I were into Zen at the time, I’d read from the Rōshis. If it were the Japanese language, I’d consume myself with anime, Duolingo, and constant Hiragana & Katakana practice.
Now that I find myself searching for more energetic alignment, I’ll be spending half of the year in a studio studying the art of yoga.
As much as I’d love to fill the rest of my time with religious studies, the only thing I realistically have time for is a bit of bible study maybe once a week and reading The Gospel of Sri Anandamayi Ma.
Not to mention the homework I’ve been assigned with from my yogic studies.
And that I must be satisfied with.
I read back on a post I wrote a lifetime ago and it got me thinking. Unfortunately, it wasn’t on the lighter side of thinking but with a bit more somber.
I know myself too well. I know my “self” too well yet not the path that lays before me.
If you would’ve asked me at the time where I see myself in 2025, I definitely wouldn’t have said here.
And I wonder if that’s ok or if I’m betraying myself in some way.
I feel even to question this is to question the life God has paved for me.
So until then, I won’t ask about where I am. But I will question where I’m going. I think that’s the best thing I could do for myself in the moment.
Somewhere within those questions lies the answer God holds for me.
Are you where you thought you would be?
Do you know where you’re going?
Would you change directions?
Where would you go?
I think these are questions worth pondering when you have a subtle obsession with destiny like I do.
Maybe I’ve watched too much Avatar in my years.
Or maybe I’m ignoring something that’s never left me.
I pray I am only following Truth. I must be.
Let’s talk soon? Maybe even tomorrow.
We’ll see.
–Natalia