For so long now, I believed that I had come to terms with my presence here on Earth.
Originally, it wasn’t even a thing I pondered.
Around the time I hit my preteen to teen years, I was personally going through a lot.
Between having an unstable home and school life, I went through periods of feeling neglected, ignored, bullied, targeted, depressed, suicidal, and so much more.
It was during this time that I began questioning my worth and existence.
I have a diary full of entries cursing the day I was born.
Eventually when I discovered true spirituality and self-development, these thoughts and feelings began to fade.
Today, about 7 years later, I looked in the mirror and said aloud, I am grateful for my existence. I am grateful that I get to experience this life here on Earth. I am grateful for this reality.
If you would’ve asked me a couple of days ago if I cared for being alive, I probably would’ve shrugged. And maybe even if you ask me tomorrow, I may do the same.
But today I felt a shift. Today, I meant what I said.
Without me being here on Earth, I wouldn’t get to experience the profundity of the Universe.
I wouldn’t have been able to meet God the way I did.
I wouldn’t be able to experience the five senses and feel emotions the way I do and scream at the top of my lungs!
I am grateful for my existence.
As a devotee, I now feel ashamed to even question my worth, my existence.
To question my life is to question Source.
And that to me sounds absurd.
So I write this coming from a place of gratitude.
When you become aware of the unlimited potential you have, your life changes immaculately.
As a being that stems from God itself, you are limitless.
You are abundant.
Your life is precious. And sacred. And necessary.
Lately I’ve decided to put my all into my craft.
I’ve decided to put my all into helping others.
So here I am;
doing what I can.
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I love you.
I really do.
Don’t believe me?